On Marriage 2

This is another story about marriage.

Werther Armand’s puzzle regarding marriage was exaggerated by his mother, who had revealed him the boundaries of his metaphor previously. As a young man without any driving knowledge and thus unable to argue with Lady Macbeth, Werther Armand immediately registered for a driving course to find out more what a stopped or run-out-of gasoline car would do.

In the first few classes, he could not manage at all; a few pedals and the stick had got him completely. The driving instructor was so restless all the time and scolded him almost every minute during the classes. Werther Armand was upset about being reprimanded unreasonably. Why would this instructor be so cocky? He would not have been needed had Werther Armand known the mechanism of a vehicle and driving. Despite this mixed feeling, Werther Armand did not cease to think about his mother’s metaphor to his driving. How would driving a car be relevant to marriage? People just got married out of peer pressure, social expectations and materialistic factors. Marriage was just the wrapping paper for ridiculously expensive bridal dresses, wedding banquet and all other related commercial objects. Being capable of driving a car would definitely be more practical than getting married in a pragmatic society.

Werther Armand was in the middle of a busy road packed with many cars during his reasoning in a class. He stopped in front of the traffic lights and waited. As the lights changed, he was still engrossed in his problematic.

“What the hell are you doing here, you idiot? Are you not looking at the traffic lights? It is green now, start the god-damn car and move your ass! Have you not heard the cars behind us are honking the horns at us?

“Right, I got it!” said Werther Armand delightedly in contrast to the instructor’s furious cry. He found his answer!

Getting married is like getting a car, a modern commodity. Marriage is not just the wrapping paper, it is itself a product! When all of your friends and relatives are driving their own car, it will be bizarre for you not to have your own. So, it is very understandable that the others honk at you. You cannot stop in the middle of the road to block their way. They have got business to do! If marriage is a car, when it stops, it just needs gasoline to move on. You keep its maintenance, you wax it, you wash it, you bring it to a garage for checking, etc. The car runs again. In marriage, since love dies right after it, it needs a lot of happy family gatherings, children, pets, the husband checking the wife if she is having an affair, vice versa, to maintain the marriage. Then the marriage runs again.

“Oh! Mother, you need to help me about this again, I got myself in some serious mental dilemma this time. It was all because of you starting this quest! In case the car can’t run anymore despite multiple scrutinizes, we can just throw it to the rubbish. But marriage is something organic and social… what shall be done to keep it moving in such a condition?” Werther Armand cried this question out aloud from his bedroom.

“Then throw your trashy spouse and get a new one through divorce, my son, you’ve never been so stupid, are you taking drugs!” Lady Macbeth cried from the living room and was ready to check if her son was smoking marijuana.

Alright, that explains why people change cars or they keep several at a time; For marriage, it needs something called divorce to deal with the broken marriage and get another new one so that people get  remarried and tri-married happily again. It does not change the functions and fundamentals of a car and marriage. It still is a car, it is a necessity that we need. So is marriage!

“Say, what are you smoking?” ordered fiercely Lady Macbeth.

“Mother, I misunderstood you before! Love is not a necessity but marriage is! Finally, what a sacred truth about modern society! Wait, something is wrong. Why did you not throw away your trashy spouse or dad do? What does a divorce do?

A strong slap onto Werther Armand’s face ended this conversation.

Mother was so angry and slapped me with tears in her eyes, did I ask something wrong?

By for now, see you next blog!

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